Penis pumps and masturbation...

I was reading some quotes from Einstein yesterday...mostly because I didn't have anything better to do, and I came upon one that struck me as pretty funny:

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." --Albert Einstein

Case in point is this guy from Chicago. Seriously, out of all the things you could've told airport security your "device" was, you pick A BOMB!? What an idiot! So, not only does your mother know what you were packing, but so does the rest of the world, AND you now face a possible felony conviction with up to three years in prison! Was having a hard-on in Turkey really worth all that risk? And don't they sell sex toys over there anyways? If not, I'm sure you could get one over the internet and have it shipped to you...or better yet, ship the damn thing to yourself in Turkey! I will never understand stupid people's rationale.

Speaking of sex, I'm getting increasingly shocked at the mention of the word masturbation on The Simpsons. It's like they've found a word that made it through the cracks, and now they're blasting it out as much as possible. The word itself doesn't make me blush, but kids watch this show for crying out loud! And they watch it as a family...with their parents! It's on Prime Time! I know for a fact that my little cousins have been watching this show since they were like born, and I also know how sexually repressed my aunt and uncle are. I can only imagine what little Davy's sex talk was like...if he even had one. And I'm sure there are a million families out in the midwest just like this one. Take the word out of the show, Groening...it's just as funny a show without it.

Tonight, after work, the girls and I are headed over to the Pig N Whistle to check out their happy hour. Maybe it will rock, maybe it will suck, but there's only one way to find out, right? If it sucks, then we might head over to Space Coast Stadium for $1.00 draft night...weather permitting, of course :)

Question of the day:

How old were you when you got the sex talk from your parents?

Myself, I never got one. My Mom made me read "Are you there God, it's Me, Margaret" by Judy Blume to expain my period...and it did a horrible job because it's so outdated. And then when I was 17 and really sick once she came into my room and said, "You know your birth control pills aren't as effective when your on antibiotics." And that was the extent of my sex talk.